- You alright?

- Yeah it jumps sometimes

- You definitely look better naked, high five!

- I’m sorry, i didnt know that wasnt real hair, im sure you can re-attach it, right?

- I think you just broke my balls

- (whispering) come to butthead…what no nothing

- Are your parents home?

- I think your cat is staring at my butt

- Youre going to love this story!

- Catcher, Victor Martinez, primera base, Ryan Garko, Jhonny Peralta en shortstop(girl wanted me to talk dirty to her, I said the lineup for the cleveland indians with a thick spanish accent, she didnt notice)

- If you dont clean that off your chest I aint touching you

- If I smack it it jiggles, look look!

- So this jew walks into a bar